# 64 - My blogger award.. Yay! -Part 1

So I got my second blogger award! The first one- 'The Versitile Blogger was given to me by Furee Cat  Furree Katt from The Jackky Bhagnani Obsession and now my second one from Kamila from Basket of Dreams who bestowed this blogger award to me, and now I am going to show it off to you guys:

The versatile blogger award is also there on the right hand side panel ---->

Ok for both awards I need to write a few things about myself and award some as well, this I will do in the second part of my post coming up very soon.

# 63 - I can't find any decent word games online

I really can't.

I tried Yahoo! games but for some reason it is not working. This is most annoying. I have used up all the crossword puzzle books that I had at home and frankly for I am done with crosswords for a while. ( Although they are my favorite nerdy pastime at most times)

Everytime I do find something, it always has some string attached to it, either you have to pay for it, or it's only on a trial basis or some other damn problem.

I want to find something for free!

# 62 - Missing keys,clips,receipts and parallel universes

Have you ever had a hairclip, a pair of keys, sunglasses or some other random item just disappear into nowhere from right in front of your eyes and remain missing for an indefinite amount of time only to resurface in the most unexpected place hours/days/weeks later.

A worm-hole traveler in your very home

No one knows where they go, or how they come back, no one comes and goes into your room except for you, yet these random items seem to appear and disappear out of their accord.-Sometimes from your very own handbag.

I am sure I didn't even need to ask this to anyone in my opening sentence, it happens with everyone, and there is only one logical explanation for it:


The parallel universe.

Yes. It really exists A self-contained separate reality coexisting with one's own, and sometimes these little odds and ends somehow vanish into the other world, so that we can be bothered by their absence until somehow they manage to return.

For somereason this does not effect people, I wonder why, I would rather like to see what Oz is like.

# 61 - All lame indian songs still remind me of you

Oh yes they do.

They make me think of the old days, when we were just kids chilling in school, and everything was so carefree, everything was so perfect. The future lay stretched out in front of us like lovely wondrous plains waiting to be conquered. We were so giddy with excitement to begin our journey, to take that first step,which would be the first among the thousands to reach to the place where we dreamed to be.

We went through hail and rain and sunshine and storm, there was darkness and light, tears and joy, no matter what happened we still managed to go through

Then why did our steps falter so close to the destination?

It's all your fault.You lost the strength to carry on. Material things tempted you and all what was before was forgotten. You changed, and that changed me.

I hate you for it, because I am someone else now. I talk to other people, I have different friends, I look at life differently than when I did before.I am independent, and I am strong, and I don't need any one to take care of me.

but then, why do all lame Indian songs still remind me of you?

# 60- oh dammit! FBL - (facebook life)

Happy New Year all!

Welcome to my very first blog post of 2011. Ok, so getting to the point. I'm sure all of you internet buffs know about FML ( f*** my life) and MLIA ( My life is average), websites where people come and post their life's most messed up,embarrassing, or just plain average moments.But I think none of them can compare to the amount of 'facebook induced' incidents which plague our lives everyday. 

 There is no escape. There is no hiding from it.And there is no privacy.

It is so funny how some people are so, well, I won't use a word as strong as 'obsessed' but well, you could say they take face book so seriously that one would think that it's a matter of life and death.

Every post, every ‘like’, every comment is scrutinized for seem deep hidden meaning that is always aimed directly at YOU.

‘oh my God, did you see that? I changed my display picture and everyone commented on it except for her, she is so totally jealous of me, I don’t believe it- HOW RUDE”. – and they will go on and on about how jealous the individual is – the fact that the person in question might have not even logged on to facebook in three weeks cause they actually have a life will not cross their minds!

I have a rule that I like to stick by, usually. That is –

Whatever happens on facebook, stays on facebook. The end. It is not be considered a part of real life nor is to be taken as seriously.

 Someone made a catty remark on your ‘oh so serious’ and philosophical status.- It does not mean they are out to get you, nor do that fights that seem to ensure on a controversial status update or post

‘He was rude to me on facebook, therefore I will not talk to him properly in person’ 

‘Really? What happened?

He thinks that my Farmville posts are annoying he wrote that on my wall- IMAGINE

Oh my God! That’s horrible! – BLOCK HIM

I do understand that sometimes people tend to mean things on facebook- uploading unflattering pics of the ones you want to embarrass, etc, but that is, I have observed. minimal in comparison to the all mountains out of molehills that people make.

They expect to be able to view everything on each of their friends profile, and you find out that you cannot see someones photos. You assume/deduce that you have been put on that much feared list- the limited profile

OMG I can’t see her photos, when the rest of my friends can. Whatabitch! – BLOCK HER!

This one is my favorite though and really takes the cake-where Facebook is the sweetest form of revenge ‘She was SO rude to me at the party the other day, what does she think of her self? I need to get back to her somehow I know!…. I WILL PUT HER ON LIMITED PROFILE.’ Yeah- like that is worst thing one could do to someone… heh.  

And so on.

The above post was inspired by hours of stirring conversation regarding FBL with my dear friend Furree Katt who owns the awesome blog The Jackky Bhagnani Obsession.

# 59 - The food blog

 

I thought that I ought to write a post related to what my blog was originally intended to be about - I do that sometimes. Ok, So my diet/exercise is going pretty well now, have lost 7 pounds and umm i guess 7 or 8 more to go. I can't wait. I hope it  really happens.

I've really turned around my eating style, nothing too heavy in the morning or at night, and I eat normally in the afternoon/evening time, it really helps your digestion process or something like that.

What I ate for lunch today:Mushroom Soup

Weight training and Tae-Bo is also helping me in a major way. You have no idea of how even 15 minutes of weight training a day can help you tone, it's crazy difficult but really pays off.

It 's a funny story how I discovered Tae-bo, it was an the end of this ancient Jane Fonda video that my sister-in-law had bought years ago, and boom! I had a whole new perspective

on exercise!

I also have a pair of 2 Kg weights at home which are also a great help.

I don't really need to use anything heavier than that so it's cool.

Ok, I'm not perfect though, in the process of writing this article I also ate some of these:

                                               A little bit of what heaven must be like

BUT, this just means an extra half an hour of exercise today, I think I'll manage it.

# 58 - It's freezing!

It's freezing here in my city, and although I thought winter had come weeks ago, it really seems to have hit now.

The weather forecast says its 9 C but I think it has to be at least 6 or 7. I'm so cold, I should go and wear some socks.

# 57- I'm not that girl

I got a recommendation to read 'The Wizard of Oz' from a dear friend today, she said it was a pre-requisite for this book called 'Wicked' which is a prequel or something to the original book, and it's supposed to be really good.

I don't believe it, I had seen the movie so many times as a kid, but I never read the book, now that I am reading it, it's actually quite nice. The kind that is a obviously meant for kids, but that the adult who likes to read books would also enjoy. I am really zooming through it cause I can't wait to read Wicked. It's been made into a musical as well, and has a really nice song (which is the title of my blog post today).

I love reading old books, especially like  these. Books which are good make my heart glow with happiness when I read them, and many of you will think that I am being very over dramatic here, but some of you may understand.

On another note, the year is finally drawing to a close, and oh.my.God. What a year it has been.

Hands touch, eyes meet,
sudden silence, sudden heat
hearts leap in a giddy world.
He could be that boy,
but I'm not that girl 

An illustration of my life this year

I feel like I have grown as a person so much this year. It has been one major emotional and mental roller coaster ride, which is not exactly over but still, I think over the past 361 ( about 4 days left) I have somewhat learned to ride the roller coaster without shutting my eyes in fear. I feel a wee more confident that I can take on the next dip that comes along ( which would be the 'x' marked on the graph right here.

Don't dream too far, don't lose sight of who you are,
don't remember that rush of joy.
He could be that boy,
I'm not that girl 

 I really am not the girl that I was before.I wouldn't say I'm better or worse, just different. I do at times miss the way things used to be, cause I was used  to them being that way, now suddenly everything is different.

( Notice I tend to write a lot without giving too much away, I don't think I need to, I guess by being vague people might be able to relate more to what I write, as they can adapt my words to their own frame of mind)

Every so often we long to steal,
to the land of what might have been,
but that doesn't soften the ache we feel
when reality sets back in

# 56 - Update

I wanted to update everyone that I am still here even though I have been neglecting my blog a lot.

That happens when I tend to be a little on the happy side MashAllah. ( not that I mean this blog to be depressing or anything, but for some reason I tend to write a lot more when I am feeling a little down cause it helps me to feel better).

But this is not right, no matter what my mood is I do not want to lose my commitment to blogging, hence here I am again.

I have some ideas for a few more posts but I need to take some photos to accompany them, once that is done I shall post something more readable.

# 55 - The heart always wants what the mind resisits.....

Why must it always be so?

Why does ones heart always go in that exact direction where your mind puts a great big STOP sign. The bigger the STOP sign, the brighter the flashing lights warning you to turn back the more forcefully ones heart stomps away in that very direction.

It can be anything from a matter of the heart ( haha a made a pun! WIN!) to a matter of avoiding that leftover chocolate bar in the fridge, to putting the snooze on the alarm for just five more minutes even though you know it going to make you late for work, when you have already used up all the lates for the month.

So why do we do this? Why are we always irresistibly attracted to that which we know is totally wrong for us? Why in the battle of the heart and mind, the heart almost always tends to win, and if the mind does manage to get the occasional victory, it leaves it usually too exhausted to reap the befits of the win.)

( notice I am careful in my wording, I use the words 'almost always' and 'occasional' and 'usually' - so don't blame me for generalizing)

Anyway my diagnosis of the situation is that we as humans tend to be inherently  self-destructive. Yes, that is the crux of it that is what we are. We live to destroy ourselves, mentally,physically and emotionally, and those who don't well.... I'd say they are a little selfish don't you think?

As a famous writer ( I forget the name) said -  "There is a pleasure in being mad, that none but mad men know"  

This may seem out of context, but it makes sense to me.

#54 - OMG am I back? am I back?

Apologies to my handful or so of readers who might have been missing me. But I had been suffering a major mental block and not to mention had (thankfully) been very busy, so did not have time to write. Now I feel that this was being majorly unfair to my dear blog.

I thank God now that life is better than it was before, i have lost 5 pounds! ( that means I have reached 25% of my goal), I got a mild promotion at work, and I made a couple of new friends, God has been kind and my blog helped along the way.

There are still a few things which keep lingering on my mind and heart, maybe by the time the new year dawns I will have figure a way out. But I am not going to rush it, I am going to let it simmer. Rome was not built in a day, and patience is virtue.. ( Ok now I am going to stop with the lame-ass adages and talk about something more interesting).

but like what?....

maybe I need a few more days to get the cogs in my mind turning.

# 53 - Starting my journey ahead- now this blog is finally relevant

Ok, This is it! This is finally finally it. I am sick and tired of my unhealthy life style ( having mainly a desk job)  and at constant failed attempts at trying to get rid of these nagging 15 pounds that have been the bane of my life of the past two years! I have been cooking my own food for the past few weeks, been trying to get moderate exercise, but this just not seems to be working. I need to rev it up!

One of my best friends is getting married in a few months and I have to have to look good on her wedding, I am thinking of wearing a 'sari' to one of the events, and though it's not like I am really fat, I certainly don't have the look to pull of a sari at the moment.

So I have decided to start weight training, um, since the past four days. Oh man, it is waaay harder than it seems and takes a lot of you, it may only be 2 kg weights but I think it already shows a minor ( very minor) difference.According to the internet, a new exercise savvy acquaintances and a few health magazine articles it's the fastest way to lose weight and build metaboilsm. ( did i Spell that right?- whatever)

Ok, so updating here I am currently 14 pounds ( ideally 19 ) away from my goal. 14 should not be to hard right?- WRONG. It's when you have little weight like this to lose that it becomes hard! 

Anyway, so losing weight also means healthy eating and that means baking and grilling stuff is the way to go. For some odd reason since we shifted houses my dad bought this really cool stove.....but without an oven.I wanted to buy one but being a little low on cash these days received a generous donation from my uncle, low and behold:

Ok, so it's not really an oven, it's an old outdated type of oven-toaster. But it's the kind that is likely to work and will help me turn out nice stuff which looks like this:

 Ok, ignoring the pasta on the side, yes I am actually make stuff like this now. 

So hopefully my new friend the 'Oven-Toaster' will help me churn out healthy stuff which will help me get to where I need to be!

# 52 - Indifference is bliss, or is it?

Ever feel like you are forgetting things that you aren't really supposed to forget?

I'm not talking about Alzheimers, :p I mean if one is starting to feel indifferent about things that ought to matter but suddenly... they don't. It's not even about becoming uncaring with with a don't-give-a-damn attitude, it's more like the things which loomed over ones head for ages,things which you obsessed over to no end start to eventually fade.

It is supposed to be a good thing I suppose, but one gets so used to worrying that when the worry is not there it feels... weird! Like I am feeling now. I know a certain thing in my life is supposed  to bother me, that would be the normal thing to do, but recently...it's not.Am I supposed to be relieved? I don't really know!

They say time fixes a lot of things, I believe that too, but you would think that 'time' would also take some 'time' and move in an orderly manner- and not suddenly fast forward your feelings,thoughts and emotions to what you think they ought to be six months from now! It's not supposed to be so fast, that means it's gonna come back and smack you in the face- it's like being on a cabbage soup diet- you lose weight for a week and then it comes back on-with GAS!

How can one know for sure!

That's another thing I hate- not knowing! Yes, life in it's very nature is uncertain for all of us, but at least if one knows what they want they can focus toward it, if they don't get it, they can say 'chalo koi baat nahin Allah malik hai'  ( Does not matter, God will look out for you).

So to summarize, sometimes it sucks when you don't get what you want, but what happens when you don't know what you want?  Yikes!

# 51 Writing for the sake of writing

I have not written anything in the past few days- been bogged down by the Eid holidays. Doing nothing is really very tiring. I seem to feel more relaxed and alert when I am busy. I was actually thinking of taking a few days off work to get some errands done, but I have come to realize that I would probably end up wasting my time. The only time I would really like to take a few days off work if I were going for a vacation somewhere- which should be due soon, I hope.A place like this would be nice:

How I would love to take a couple of weeks off and go to place like this! Just to relax on the beach and breathe the fresh air.Get away from it all and come back refreshed and renewed

Ok, back to reality;

So, since tomorrow is Monday and this long long five-day weekend comes to an end. I find myself actually, mildly looking forward to it. See how enthused I am. Work starts in five hours and I am already, actually, still awake typing away randomly.





I am not too worried about being late for work, I am sure I shall manage- for once I have packed my lunch (A brown bread sandwich with grilled chicken and Tabasco sauce), ironed my clothes, ( same old thing I have worn before- I need to go shopping). I do need to clean out my handbag though, it's over flowing with recipts and gum wrappers. I think I'll do that sometime later this morning.

# 50- Eid, long weekends and loving goats

Eid Holidays and a five day weekend! A rare occurrence but nevertheless a welcome one. It's been a long time since I have had a long holiday like this- it's good, although just a little bit boring. Most of this Eid is spent in... you know how it is, I don't need to describe it.

Anyway, since almost everyone has their own funny goat-related stories to tell, I am going to tell mine; we had two goats which we kept at an aunts house, since they have a nice garden with lots of space for them to roam about. Really cute they were milling around seemingly oblivious to their impending doom- or were they? I don't really think so; cause my cousin saw them two days ago going full 'brokeback mountain' on each other if you know what I mean- yes they were both MALE. I think they were just trying to make the most of their last days. I am not going to judge- it's a free world. I was thinking that it would be funny if they were mountain goats, cause then I could call them 'Brokeback Mountain-Goats' :D

Well, that was yesterday, and this is today. The goats are gone and I am going console myself on their loss with a nice plate of lamb chops  * evil smile*

This is not really a picture of one of the goats, I just googled it and put this one on, I forgot to take any pictures of them