# 111 - My Savior

 I have God to thank that my gym routine has become my savior. With the almost unbearable work-related and personal stress that I been going through the almost-daily routine from 7 – 9:30 pm has given me a way to escape into a place where I can just be happy and feel good about myself. Yes, perhaps 2.5 -3 hours at the gym is really pushing it, and I don’t really know how this is going to effect my health but I believe with all my heart that InshAllah it will do me good.

Weight training is something which I have to do to tone, but what I love most is cardio, especially running, running for ages on treadmill. It at times drains the life out you, you feel like your heart and lungs might explode with exhaustion, but you feel alive, the pain, frustration and anxiety that you have experienced during the day burns out of you in a great steam of energy.

 By the time I get home I am usually beyond exhausted but you know whats the best thing about that? I’m too tired to think, and hence too tired to worry. This is the best drug I have ever come across and I hope I never kick the habit.

# 57- I'm not that girl

I got a recommendation to read 'The Wizard of Oz' from a dear friend today, she said it was a pre-requisite for this book called 'Wicked' which is a prequel or something to the original book, and it's supposed to be really good.

I don't believe it, I had seen the movie so many times as a kid, but I never read the book, now that I am reading it, it's actually quite nice. The kind that is a obviously meant for kids, but that the adult who likes to read books would also enjoy. I am really zooming through it cause I can't wait to read Wicked. It's been made into a musical as well, and has a really nice song (which is the title of my blog post today).

I love reading old books, especially like  these. Books which are good make my heart glow with happiness when I read them, and many of you will think that I am being very over dramatic here, but some of you may understand.

On another note, the year is finally drawing to a close, and oh.my.God. What a year it has been.

Hands touch, eyes meet,
sudden silence, sudden heat
hearts leap in a giddy world.
He could be that boy,
but I'm not that girl 

An illustration of my life this year

I feel like I have grown as a person so much this year. It has been one major emotional and mental roller coaster ride, which is not exactly over but still, I think over the past 361 ( about 4 days left) I have somewhat learned to ride the roller coaster without shutting my eyes in fear. I feel a wee more confident that I can take on the next dip that comes along ( which would be the 'x' marked on the graph right here.

Don't dream too far, don't lose sight of who you are,
don't remember that rush of joy.
He could be that boy,
I'm not that girl 

 I really am not the girl that I was before.I wouldn't say I'm better or worse, just different. I do at times miss the way things used to be, cause I was used  to them being that way, now suddenly everything is different.

( Notice I tend to write a lot without giving too much away, I don't think I need to, I guess by being vague people might be able to relate more to what I write, as they can adapt my words to their own frame of mind)

Every so often we long to steal,
to the land of what might have been,
but that doesn't soften the ache we feel
when reality sets back in

# 53 - Starting my journey ahead- now this blog is finally relevant

Ok, This is it! This is finally finally it. I am sick and tired of my unhealthy life style ( having mainly a desk job)  and at constant failed attempts at trying to get rid of these nagging 15 pounds that have been the bane of my life of the past two years! I have been cooking my own food for the past few weeks, been trying to get moderate exercise, but this just not seems to be working. I need to rev it up!

One of my best friends is getting married in a few months and I have to have to look good on her wedding, I am thinking of wearing a 'sari' to one of the events, and though it's not like I am really fat, I certainly don't have the look to pull of a sari at the moment.

So I have decided to start weight training, um, since the past four days. Oh man, it is waaay harder than it seems and takes a lot of you, it may only be 2 kg weights but I think it already shows a minor ( very minor) difference.According to the internet, a new exercise savvy acquaintances and a few health magazine articles it's the fastest way to lose weight and build metaboilsm. ( did i Spell that right?- whatever)

Ok, so updating here I am currently 14 pounds ( ideally 19 ) away from my goal. 14 should not be to hard right?- WRONG. It's when you have little weight like this to lose that it becomes hard! 

Anyway, so losing weight also means healthy eating and that means baking and grilling stuff is the way to go. For some odd reason since we shifted houses my dad bought this really cool stove.....but without an oven.I wanted to buy one but being a little low on cash these days received a generous donation from my uncle, low and behold:

Ok, so it's not really an oven, it's an old outdated type of oven-toaster. But it's the kind that is likely to work and will help me turn out nice stuff which looks like this:

 Ok, ignoring the pasta on the side, yes I am actually make stuff like this now. 

So hopefully my new friend the 'Oven-Toaster' will help me churn out healthy stuff which will help me get to where I need to be!